Today's post is brought to you by the letters G, I, and F!!

I'm working on an actual post right now, but it's not ready yet, so you guys are getting more gifs....sorry!

When someone says that I shouldn't eat so fast:

When I've hated someone so hard for so long, and all of a sudden, I couldn't give two fucks about them:

When I hit traffic on my way home from work:

When I'm not sure how to greet someone: 

When I saw the video in which my ex-boyfriend's friend called me fat, and the ex-boyfriend laughed:

How I feel when work piles up:

How I feel when everyone in my office goes to lunch but me:

When I run into someone I don't like:

How I play with my dogs:

How I feel when someone I don't like gets schooled:

Once I've done this, I can die happy:

Hint: I'm the velociraptor.

Side bar: My browser doesn't recognize velociraptor as a real word, so it's suggestion was to change it to velocipede. I honest to God pictured an abomination that was a cross of a velociraptor and a centipede. You know, the feel good, happy stuff. Turns out, it's this: 

Now, if you could replace the lovely gent in the picture with, ohhh I don't know, maybe a velociraptor, then you'll find that this dream of mine has officially been upgraded. Wait, what's that?

And it's wearing a tophat? AND a monocle?? Thank you, me; you're the best! You're welcome, me.

When my best friend asks me why I don't want to go somewhere:

When I hear the way some kids talk to adults:

When I drunkenly tell someone I love them:

When a different ex-boyfriend said he didn't actually mean any of the fucked up things he said to me because I didn't want to get back together after he "dumped me"; he was just "hurt":

How I feel about a lot of people I encounter on a daily basis (especially the two aforementioned exes and that one friend):

When I try to run when my foot's asleep:

When I couldn't make my boss at my previous company happy, no matter what I did:

When someone I don't like tries to start a conversation with me while I'm eating: 

When someone leaves me a long, detailed voicemail instead texting me:

This needs no explanation:

 

Kthanxbai!