Bad news, y’all…I lost my motivation. Like, I can’t find it anywhere. I’ve even looked in the
freezer because the freezer is kind of like Narnia. You never know what you
might find in there. Holy crap, I totally figured out where the entrance to
Narnia is in my apartment. Actually I have two: the freezer (obviously) and the
dryer. I would say I probably have an entrance in my closet as well, but my
closets are tiny and Narnia wouldn’t fit….yet somehow my freezer and dryer are
able to hold Narnia within them. Interesting.
I don’t know how Narnia works.
Related note: I think Mary Poppin’s purse (or would it be
Poppins’? Apparently I don’t know how fictional characters’ names work either)
also contains Narnia within it. And it’s infinitely smaller than my tiny,
hobbit-sized closets. And it’s portable. Two things:
1)Why the fuck does she get magical powers AND a portable Narnia?? Because she’s played by Julie
Andrews, and clearly Jules sold her soul to the devil. What a bitch. The hills are alive with the sound of music. And the screams of the innocent.
2)The smaller the
object, the more likely you are to find Narnia. So ladies, when gift giving
time comes around, don’t be upset with your guy because that tiny jewelry box
contains earrings and not a ring. Get upset because it contains earrings and
not Narnia. Scratch that…get upset because the tiny box doesn’t contain
earrings AND Narnia.
….I clearly don’t know how Narnia works. Or Mary Poppins. Or Julie Andrews. Or freezers. Or closets. Or dryers. Or gift giving.
Seriously y'all...how have I made it this far in life?
 |
| This is probably where the moths come from too. Narnia moths are the worst. |
